I'm better at blogging then at trading

I'm sick of my roller coaster rides of mine p&l. Down 20 pips, down 60 pips, up 60 pips to finish where I started. Or it could be down 120 pips if market changed direction like it did after my last exit. I move like an old lady with riding losses and averaging, market is just flying around. This is so no good. I don't think that reducing size would do much good either, it would be little bit easier but again plenty of averaging to fix things and that means just more risk.
I need to commit to stops before I enter trades and enter only those trades where I'm committed that I will exit humbly when I'm stopped.

My first loss with red dot was there just because I was slow enough in moving stop. I was in process of moving it up when it got hit. Then I reopened, and guess what I doubled size 90 seconds later to get stopped out again. It's just gambling it can't be called trading. Well at least on my last trade with 3X size on I was thinking properly in a sense what is market doing. It was also emotional trade to get back losses and to my amazement I did. Who knows where would I get out of that trade if it went south. Yeah, I forget to mention that on my first trade I had two times 10sec window of opportunity to take 8 and 10 pips. Maybe less then 10 sec, but it was there.
It's ringing in my head that before I would gladly grab that kind of profit just because I have opportunity. Maybe there is more wisdom in that then I trust there is. That's my kind of scalping, looking for more bring me exact problems like today. I'm just too emotional to handle bigger swings in whatever direction. I would like to grab forexbird kind of profits but I'm not prepared for his kind of stops. I can commit to small stops only when I'm looking for small gains. Then I believe that it's not good strategy. Knowing me that got to carry out that trading what is? I don't have on disposal better trader so I need to do things that are limited to my limited capacity. Maybe progress is made to small losses big wins only when you get small loss small wins as your second nature.

+1 pip